In general, when you send out wedding invitations, you have a pretty good idea of who will be RSVPing “Yes” and who will be sending their regrets. Sometimes, however, those reception cards can be a bit of a shocker.

We’ve heard stories about close friends declining invitations with little to no excuse, leaving the engaged couple confused to say the least. This type of scenario has us wondering—if a declined invitation hurts your feelings or leaves you baffled, is it appropriate to speak up? Can you ask why a guest isn’t attending your celebration?

What’s the best way to handle such a tricky situation? Have you ever declined a wedding invitation from a close friend? Do confrontations over declined invitations make you want to rant or rave?

This summer, one of my dear friends was dragged to an engagement party, a bridal shower, a bachelorette weekend (not just one night!), another bridal shower and, of course, the wedding. She was asked to bring gifts to every event, and to help pay for the parties more often than not.

The real kicker is, she wasn’t in the bridal party. She was the only non-bridal party guest who was expected to be at every event because she’s know the bride since they were kids.

What wedding events should be mandatory for non-bridal party members? Who should be expected to pay for extra events? What’s the proper protocol for close friends who aren’t bridesmaids or groomsmen? Rant or rave about it!

We’ve heard this story time and time again:

You invite a friend to your wedding. You’ve perfectly budgeted, so when he asks if he can bring his girlfriend, you give him your regrets and let him know that you simply can’t accommodate another guest. He knows at least a dozen other people at the wedding, so you assure him it will be fun without his girlfriend by his side.

Your big day arrives, and lo and behold you see your friend saunter up with his girlfriend. Iin front of all of your guests while you are standing there in your wedding attire with your new spouse, he asks, “It’s okay if Jenny stays for the reception, right?”

This is a classic wedding crasher sabotage move. Bringing a guest who is not invited is a faux pas all on its own, but asking your permission on the day of your wedding is downright rude.

What would you do? Smile and say, “Of course,” or toss him and his girlfriend out to make more room for your more polite friends?

What’s the proper way to handle a wedding crasher? Is it the more the merrier? Rant or rave about it!