Many grooms choose to head out for a round of golf with their groomsmen and male relatives on the morning of the big day, but that doesn’t mean golf is the only activity available to the groom and his buddies. Here are a few other ideas that will make the day even more memorable:

• Play a sport. From touch football to soccer, softball and tennis, there are plenty of team sports that are guaranteed to be a good time. Just make sure to plan ahead so that everyone comes prepared (and don’t let the groom get tackled!).
• Get into games. Host a video game marathon or challenge the groomsmen to bowling, billiards or poker for a little friendly competition.
• Book a massage. What better way to help everyone look relaxed and glowing than with an hour-long pre-wedding massage?
• Be adventurous. Check out a local rock climbing gym or race go karts together. Trying something new is a great way to have a blast before the wedding!

Selecting the members of your bridal party can be tricky—there are obligatory bridal party participants (family), different tiers of best friends (who seem to come in groups) and the issue of matching the number of people on your spouse’s side of the aisle.

Sometimes people’s feelings get hurt, and sometimes you end up with massive (or tiny!) bridal parties, but the question remains: is it better to deal with the drama of selecting your bridal party, or should you just not have one at all?

Would you forgo all of the help your bridesmaids and groomsmen offer in order to eliminate the stress of selecting them?

Does the idea of not having a bridal party make you want to rant or rave?

Photo from Manus Chau Photography

Dear Divas,

I have a small dilemma.  My fiance has 8 guys he wants to be in our wedding.  He is pretty set on this number and it would be bad to cut anyone out.  I, on the other hand, either have to have 5 people or go up to 9 – there is no in between as I would end up hurting some feelings if I left anyone out or only added one or two more girls.  As it stands right now, it’s looking like we’re going to have a really uneven bridal party, with 8 on his side and 5 or 9 on mine!  I know it’s silly, but this really bothers me.  Is it ok to have an uneven bridal party?  How will they walk down the aisle?

Concerned Bride

Dear Concerned Bride,

These days, it’s very common to step outside the lines of tradition (and symmetry!) and have a different number of people standing up on each side at the wedding.  There is no harm in it and no etiquette rules that argue against lopsided bridal parties.  It’s entirely up to the bride and groom to do what they want, as long as it doesn’t come at the cost of making someone feel uncomfortable in the processional, recessional, dances, etc.

There are a lot of ways to avoid making anyone feel out of place.  They are as follows:

Ceremony Processional/Recessional

• Either have everyone walk separately down the aisle, or have the men walk in pairs (2 men to every bridesmaid and then the best man and maid of honor together). You can also have the groom’s party already at the alter when the ceremony starts–this is very common.

Reception

• For introductions, introduce each person one by one instead of having them walk in pairs
• For the dances, you have a few options.  Have each member of the bridal party dance with their date or have them do some sort of group dance.  You can also fore go the dance all together and do a toast in honor of your bridal party instead!

Just remember:  Your bridal party is there to support you and be at your side through the planning process.   Adding or removing people for the sake of numbers is unnecessary.   These people are closest to you and you should make sure to have all of those special people at your side, no matter the numbers!

If you’re still feeling uncomfortable, check out this amazing tool from David’s Bridal.  You can virtually visualize your bridal party!  It’s like seeing the future!