Wedding Style, Planning & Inspiration

Dear Divas,

I am getting married in September.  My fiance and I have been together for 5 years, and we know and get along with each others families extremely well.  I know that it is tradition for the bride’s family to pay for the wedding, however, both of us were hoping for a more nontraditional setup.  My fiance’s parents are very wealthy and helped out my fiance’s brother when he get married.  However, they are refusing to contribute anything to our wedding besides paying for the limos.  They do not give any reason for this, they just don’t want to help pay.  I feel like it may be because they think my parents are also extremely wealthy, but we really aren’t!  I know this is a touchy subject, but it seems unfair and has caused a lot of fights between my fiance and I.  We’d like this wedding to be a joint effort, not a one-sided drain on my parent’s bank account.  Help!

Broke Bride

Dear Broke Bride,

Money issues are often one of the biggest sources of frustration during wedding planning.  The sad truth is, you cannot force anyone to pay for something they don’t want to pay for.  Although you haven’t been able to get a reason out of your fiance’s parents about why they refuse to help, it really is not required that you receive one.  The truth is, you asked, they refused, and that should probably end the argument.  You may have to adjust your budget to better fit what your parents can afford.  And, perhaps you can take a look at your finances and contribute your own part to the wedding.

In the long run, you will see that it won’t matter who spent what and how much your wedding cost.  This event is about celebrating the love and commitment you and your future husband have for one another.  Just because someone is wealthy does not mean they are obligated to give you money.

Try to make this event less about the money and instead come up with creative ways to make your wedding unique and amazing without breaking the bank.  Who knows; maybe once your fiance’s family sees how careful you are being about money, they’ll be willing to contribute more.  In the meantime, express your gratitude and thanks for what they ARE contributing, no matter how small.  Your kindness may just rub off on them!