Wedding Invitation News, Etiquette & Planning Blog

Dear Divas,

My fiance and I have been together for 5 years.  About 2 years in to our relationship, we moved in together.  Since then, we’ve invested in a lot of personal items together, from furniture to kitchen tools, dishes to bedding.  Our wedding is coming up and it’s getting close to the time when we would normally register.  Because we’ve already been living together for so long, there is very little that we need for our home.  We believe in having nice things so we’ve already bought the best knives, dishes, bedding, etc.  What we really need is cash, as we are saving for a new house and for our honeymoon.  Is it ok to list cash gifts on a shower invitation or wedding website?  Is there any way for us to ask for cash without sounding crass?

Show Me the Money

Dear Show Me the Money,

Your desire to receive cash as a wedding gift as opposed to anything physical is completely understandable.  Most newlyweds not only need “stuff” to start their new life together, but they also need a place to live and funds to travel!  While it is definitely inappropriate to list “Cash gifts” on any sort of invitation or website, there are ways that you can get the word out that you’d prefer cash gifts.

Most etiquette experts consider it tasteless to flat-out ask for cash.  Instead, they suggest getting the word out to the people closest to you (like your parents, in-laws, bridesmaids and aunts, uncles and grandparents) whom guests are likely to ask for gift recommendations from.  These people can subtly spread the word about your wish for cash.

Another option is to look in to a variety of online gift registries.  There are an abundance of different wedding registries, from mortgage registries to cash registries.  Check out GoGift for an easy-to-use cash registry, Feather Our Nest for a Mortgage registry,  and a variety of different honeymoon registries, most of which will mail you a check at the close of your registry to use as you please.  The Ultimate Gift Registry is a great all-in-one registry that allows you to register for anything from honeymoons to home goods.  They also have a soon-to-be-added cash registry option.

Remember, even if you register at a store, you can often return items for cash–Bed, Bath and Beyond and Crate & Barrel are just a few that do this.  Check each store’s return policy before you register.  Who knows, you might discover there are still some items you’d like for your home.  Good luck!