Dear Divas,
I am having a destination wedding on a beach in the tropics, and I’m trying to find some bridesmaid dresses that will make all 6 of my girls happy. We’ve been looking for months and I’m starting to get frustrated. I want them all to be happy with the dresses, so I’ve let them send out options on their own. We’ve been looking at “real” bridesmaid dresses, but I prefer to get dresses from a department store so that they can be worn again. The problem is, no one ever agrees on anything! Three girls will love the dress, 2 will be ok with it, and one will hate it. I don’t want to force them to wear something that any of them will hate, so until now I’ve avoided making a final decision. However, we’re getting down to the wire and we need to find something soon. I could just pick a dress but I fear that they’ll be upset since I made it clear that they had free reign over dress selection. How do I keep everyone happy and still get the dresses bought?
Dress Disaster
Dear Dress Disaster,
First of all, it’s very sweet of you to try so hard to find a dress that will perfectly fit each of your bridesmaid’s likes and dislikes. However, as you’ve seen, it’s nearly impossible to find one dress that will match 6–actually, 7 (you have to like it too!)–individual tastes. Women come in all different shapes and sizes and style preferences are even more varied.
At this point in the game, you just need a decision made. It’s ok to bring some kind of order to the madness that is the dress selection. Instead of letting your bridesmaids have free reign to throw dress suggestions out at their whim, why not select a list of 10 dresses that you love. Email all of your ‘maids and ask them to vote on their top three. At the end of the day, you’ll have a dress that not only you are sure to like, but that the majority of your maids will like too. You can even ask them to list their three least favorite dresses–maybe it will help you to avoid selecting one that any of them will “hate”.
Another option is to go with a “real” bridesmaid dress (although I know you were trying to avoid that). The upside is that you can have the dresses all made in the same fabric but in different styles. That way, each girl will be wearing something that flatters her own body shape.
Finally, be sure to check out J. Crew’s bridesmaid line. These chic dresses are perfect for weddings but can easily double as an any-occassion dress. Good luck!
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July 21st, 2009 at 1:31 pm
Wow, this sounds just like my situation! Thank you for your help, problem solved!!
July 21st, 2009 at 1:50 pm
I love the J. Crew line!
July 21st, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Wow Tara- You are hired as my personal wedding consultant!
July 21st, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Hi,
Just a thought i went through this same thing just recently. What i did is took my four girls to the biggest dep. store i knew and said this is the kind of colour i like or something similar.
And then let them go. They ended up picking about 50 dresses which they all tried on. I wasnt fussed about them having different dresses as long as they were all the same colour or tone and it worked great. Now they all have different dresses in all different styles but in the same geneal tone and they look amazing together. So i think if you dont mind having different dresses its a good way to go.
Just a though anyway hope it all goes well for you
July 23rd, 2009 at 5:43 am
Great suggestion you have here. Although i let my bridesmaids choose their own style but also showed them the color and the style that I wanted them to wear. And it suite them well.
July 27th, 2009 at 8:36 am
Great tips. Love it!
November 15th, 2009 at 12:49 pm
Love brides made dresses they look so cool makes you feel like a real princess .