October 9

Ask Etta: Thank You Card Etiquette for Bridal Showers

While we dish about the hottest trends and latest designs, we also know how stressful prepping for the big day can be. Meet Etta, our expert in all things etiquette. She’s ready to delve into your every dilemma.

Jana Asks…

My bridal shower was a few weeks ago and I am not sure when I should send thank you cards. Is there a time frame and what should be included in the notes?

Etta Says…

You should always try to send your thank you cards for your bridal shower within two weeks. If it has already been a few weeks I would definitely get started as soon as you can. You don’t want your guests to think you forgot about them and that they were not appreciated. We know this is a very busy and stressful time for brides but try not to wait too much longer.

Usually bridal showers are more of an intimate event so it should not take you more than a few hours to write your bridal shower thank you cards.

If you are planning your bridal shower now make sure to have one of your bridesmaids or someone close to you take note of the gifts and who gave them to you. This will make the thank you card process go much smoother. You should also have all of the addresses by now since you have sent your save the date card and bridal shower invitations!

What’s Inside?

This is definitely a challenging part for some people, the contents. The basic things to include are greeting the guest, expressing your genuine gratitude, be specific and mention the gift, and thank them for attending (or if they didn’t, thank them for thinking of you).

When you make a specific reference to the gift, talk about how you are using it and how much you like it. Such as, “I am using the new robe and slippers every morning when I make my coffee. They are both so comfy!” If it is not something you extremely like you can say “I will be thinking of you every time I use it.”

Before you send the card make sure to double check you have the right person to the right gift. Besides misspelling their name, nothing is worse than addressing a gift to the wrong person.

If you are thanking someone for a monetary gift you can thank them for their generosity without mentioning an exact amount.

If you want to go a little farther you can mention how the “generosity will help with the down payment of our new house.”

Remember to also send bridal shower thank you notes and wedding thank you notes separately. Do not try to combine them into one note. If you follow etiquette you should be sending the bridal shower thank you notes before the wedding, so this should not be a problem.

Here are a couple sample thank you notes for your bridal shower:

  • “Thank you for not only attending my bridal shower, but for the lovely gift as well. You are a great friend. I will think of you every time I use my coffee maker. Thanks again.”
  • “Thank you for the lovely crystal picture frame and for coming to the shower. With friends like you, every day is truly a celebration.”
  • “Thank you for coming to the bridal shower and for the beautiful flower vase. It is such a beautiful color and will match our home perfectly. Your generosity is truly appreciated. Thanks again.
  •  “Thank you for coming to the bridal shower and for your generous gift. We are putting it toward the honeymoon. Your thoughtfulness and friendship means so much to me. Thanks again.”



Have an etiquette question for Etta? Email us at etta@weddingpaperdivas.com and she’ll post an answer for you.

Posted by Brittany Welby


5 thoughts on “Ask Etta: Thank You Card Etiquette for Bridal Showers

  1. Pingback: THANK YOU CARD ETIQUETTE | Diary of a Social Gal

  2. Bridget

    I have a question. I don’t mind writing thank you notes and I know it’s polite and I have written the majority of my bridal shower thank you notes already (my shower was last week). But I have been dragging my feet on thank you notes for the following situation….

    An older aunt attended but her adult daughters(who are on their own with families and jobs) did not attend. The aunt signed the cards for the gift AND signed all the adult daughter’s names. The gifts, while of course thoughtful because any gift is thoughtful and not required, are not super expensive things that would require chipping in from six adult children and mom. We’re talking a picture frame and a couple dish towels.

    I am writing them all thank you notes because the Internet says I should but…..seriously?! I have to send SEVEN thank you notes for a $25 gift and SIX of those people probably had no idea that their name was put on the card!! And I have to come up with something ‘personalized’ to each of them? Even though I don’t really know them because they are from my fiance’s side…I can’t even say “We missed you there!!” because I haven’t met half of them before.

    Oh, and this is not just the case for one family. There’s actually six different guests who did this (mom signs for adult children who are not there)… 🙁

    1. Rhonda

      I would think One thank you note to the Aunt who was actually there would be sufficient. Like you said, you do not know them well, the other children were not in attendance, and it was not a large gift, and they likely are not even aware of what was purchased or that their names were put on the cards. That’s what I would do.

  3. Pingback: How to Write Thank You Notes

    1. Amber

      That’s a very valid concern! Really any calligraphy ink (or other pens and markers for that matter) will work beautifully on our white felt envelopes. That said, calligraphy can definitely work on those pretty pearl shimmer envelopes. If you go that route, just order a some extra envelopes and take them to your art supply store to test the ink and find one that works best – that way you’ll be confident when you sit down to address them. Best of luck and send us a picture when they’re done!


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